slotted | ◉ inbox for overjoyed.

i hate my life

[THIS IS IT]

[THIS IS THE TEXT]

WHAT HAPPENED NOW?

hey what kind of response is that?? you could sound a little more worried about me, you know! something like

OH NO ITSUKI! WHAT'S WRONG? WHY DO YOU HATE YOUR LIFE NOW, I MEAN BESIDES THOSE OTHER EXTREMELY LEGITIMATE REASONS YOU HAVE?

or

THAT SOUNDS TERRIBLE! LIFE SUCKS! YOU KNOW, THE NEXT TIME YOU COME OVER LEITH, I'LL BUY YOU A DRINK. THREE DRINKS!! YOU KNOW WHAT, A WHOLE ROUND'S ON ME!! HOW'S THAT SOUND, PAL?

[isn't leo glad that he has a friend like itsuki]

SO ARE YOU GOING TO TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED?

man you sure are cold. how am I supposed to let out all my steam when you're like this?

[WHY are his friends like this!! WESTIES ARE DYING RIGHT IN THE BG BUT LIKE STILL!!]

this was shaping up to be a pretty good week, you know. i had a date and everything! i haven't had free time to spend with a cute girl in FOREVER. you know what i mean, right? when work gets so dull and your customers are all prissy know-it-alls or generous with their fists and not one of them is worth flirting with, but you have to sit there and take it anyway!! and now there's black rain and the company's got a bigger stick up their ass than usual, and everything's exploding. i can't go on like this

[this entire paragraph was probably like 6 texts in succession, ur welcome leo]

I'M NOT COLD.
AND YOU'RE CLEARLY DOING SOMETHING WRONG IF YOUR CUSTOMERS WANT TO PUNCH YOU IN THE MUG.
ARE THERE A LOT OF CASUALTIES? I PLAN ON VISITING NEXT WEEK ONCE THE RAIN'S STOPPED.

hey I'm not saying anything that normal, well-adjusted people can't take as a joke.

[HE'S INNOCENT!! though the next text comes a bit slower, as if delayed]

honestly? i wouldn't recommend it. at least wait another week if you really feel the need to come back. it's pretty heated atm, what with the frb blown up and all.

[WHY DIDN'T ITSUKI LEAD WITH THAT PIECE OF INFORMATION, HONESTLY. though as much as itsuki is incredibly annoying and flippant and lazy and an illegal drug-dealer, he possesses just enough compassion to worry about people like leo coming back to westerley and getting stabbed by a true leithian or something]

SURE. I BELIEVE YOU.

[ LIKE HELL HE DOES ]

I CAN'T JUST SIT HERE AND LISTEN TO THE NEWS. I WANT TO HELP.

[he's saving this text as proof that Leo believes him EVEN IF IT'S SARCASM, IT'S TEXT!! IT'S FOREVER!!]

[also WHAT THE HECK, WHY IS LEO SO SHOUNEN. Though honestly, Itsuki can't say he doesn't understand that feeling. Made worse, he knows, from the fact that Leo's from Westerley. He isn't one of those condescending elites, voicing pity while remaining thoroughly unattached. Itsuki can't stop Leo, but he'll at least nag him a little longer.]

can't you at least listen to me then? i'm way more reliable than the news! it's not just the frb, you know. the ones that blew it up are still hiding out here, and who knows how many will get rounded up before this week's over. that surrogate's still getting a lot of attention after all

[ he'll just say it was photoshopped. :) ]

I AM LISTENING. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING. IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER TO ME.

[ugh why is he like this!!!]

why are u like this

[WHY!!]

can u at least try not to be too reckless while saving the world

NOT TRYING TO SAVE THE WORLD.
JUST
HELP PEOPLE.
IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY DATES, YOU MAY AS WELL DO IT WITH ME.

wait what

HEY just because I don't have any dates lined up doesn't mean i'm TOTALLY free!!

[but ugh.... this gives him a good excuse to see that Leo doesn't tapdance his way into a True Leithian conspiracy.... UGHHHH]

ugh fine. ur still going to be reckless while helping people so i guess i'll come along

u can't crash over at my place though okay. i don't like sharing space with guys

[and then they have a sleepover later]

DIDN'T ASK TO STAY AT YOUR PLACE.
IT'S PROBABLY A MESS ANYWAY... AND HAS A LOT OF STUFF I DON'T EVEN WANT TO SEE.

[ no to your porn mags, man. not that... leo would know if itsuki has any, but still. ]

don't call me a slob when you haven't even been over!!!

[UM?? HE IS A NEAT GUY.... in one sense of the word]

what does that even mean. what kind of stuff do you not want to see?

[it can't be porn. everyone likes porn?????]